Wedding Wants vs Wedding Budgets

Hi everyone! I want to start this blog entry by apologizing for my absence. I know I haven't written in a while, but life is full of curve balls. But I am back! And yes, in my absence I have continued to help brides and grooms, I just hadn't been able to sit down and write. That being said, here goes my newest entry: WANTS vs BUDGET. Every couple that I have met in the past comes with a budget already in mind. Most of the time, they have discussed this budget among themselves. Other times, the bride has a budget in mind while the groom has a different one. Sometimes they have all the money already set for the wedding, other times they don't. Sometimes family and friends are helping them, other times, they are surprised along the way. One thing is clear though, every single couple has left out numerous things outside of their budget. Why? Because when they sit down to do their wedding budget (together or apart) they don't discuss what exactly they want their wedding to be. Here is what normally happens (this is based on numerous conversations with clients, so please keep in mind these are my observations). Usually, the bride and groom get engaged, they each talk generally about what they envision that day to be like, the bride tells her mom and friends, they immediately schedule a bridal gown appointment (or a series of them), they go look for a dress, and then they go check out venues after giving each other a $ idea of how much they want to spend, only to then be hit in the face with reality. They also go by the generic lists provided by numerous magazines, websites, and social media apps as to what needs to be included in that list of needs and the average needed to spend. So why is it that the weddings end up costing them more than they budgeted if they are following all those lists? Well, let's begin with that first talk of wedding planning between the bride and groom. What did you both envision that day to look like? How many guests? Location ideas? In state or out? Destination wedding or at home? Do we both have money set aside? Are our families going to help us out? You see, planning a wedding in terms of budget, is a project. Yes, for the bride and groom and families, it all will be a fairy tale on the day off. However, the actual steps before that are all determined by the delicate balance of WANT vs CAN vs NEED. Just because you want 200 guests at your wedding doesn't mean you need it or can afford it. Unless you are a bride and groom with an unlimited budget (AWESOME!), I suggest you start your planning by first making a list of what you WANT vs CAN AFFORD. This will all be based on that first conversation that you will have with each other. Be honest about what you can really afford. You may be wondering how you figure out what you need. By all means, feel free to use those lists provided by the magazines and social apps about what you need for your wedding, and how to budget, but remember this is all just to give you a starting point. There is a reason why people hire wedding planners, and its because a good wedding planner will make you a list of what you need based on your vision and tailor it to your budget. Many times brides and grooms come to be after they have hired and fired wedding planners or vendors because they were promised a vision at a budget and then extra costs starting showing up. I believe that a real planner will be honest with you and paint you a REALISTIC vision of your wedding. Another thing you need to do is window shop. Send messages to different vendors asking for price packages, reviews, and evidence of their work. Don't fall in love with the first location you visit. Sometimes all inclusive doesn't necessarily save you money, and sometimes it does. Go on wedding sites like The Knot and Wedding Wire and read reviews. Speak with other brides who have used vendors you are considering. When making the list of what you need for your wedding to make your vision a reality, its imperative that you be realistic about what you and your groom can afford. A beautiful memorable wedding can come at any budget, because at the end, all it takes is two people who love each other.